2008 and brand new me

To summarize to you guys about my 2008 I will divide last year into 2 parts and actually it was more abt my life in a new place. 1^st part was the 1^st semester where I was busy adapting myself in the far far away land called Kg. Telaga, Pitas as I’ve been posted at SMK Telaga for my first posting. I learnt the way their talking, their lifestyle and their custom and culture. For the first time in my life, I’ve my own house which actually the warden unit. Slowly I turned this house to a home. I bought my own TV, rice cooker, freezer, astro (as we didn’t have to pay 4 electricity & water, so I’ve xtra money!) and any other kitchen’s stuff and electrical appliances. By that time, I’ve one close fellow teacher who is from that Kampung which I asked to help me in buying all my stuff. Tq Kak Ana; for a wonderful orientation so that I knew a lot about KK, Kg. Telaga, school, Kudat, the ethnics, badminton, volleyball and so many wonderful experience.

I can say that the 1^st part is hard one when weekends came but Kak Ana was not around. I felt so lonely until I became depressed& have no motivation at all. When I heard Kak Ana was going to get married, I became paranoid. What will happen to me? In this first part, I was so vulnerable, unstable and still depending on others so much. I also exposed myself too much to other’s culture until I lost my own rhythm. I wrongly make a choice. It is so painful when I remembered this part but what I can tell u guys is I became far from my God and it made the line between bad and good became blurry. It was so hard; I was alone in my journey, in my fight with my own self. But thank God as He still loves me so that He made me realized and He gave me chance to repent and do my best in the second part OR for the rest of my life.

In the second part, I became more mature. Kak Ana had married but however God sent this ‘one man’ to help me to go through this tough life in SMK Telaga. He is also my fellow teacher; mr. K but what differentiate him from others are; he taught me how to do work, classes, hostel, administration and many more. He inspired me how to touch students’ life and eventhough he is Christians but the way he obeys his faith make me become embarrassed and I started again to put ALLAh first in everything I did. In this 2^nd part, I made my home my sanctuary. I became a happy loner. I spent my free time reading, writing my thought and whatever I felt I want to do. I took my students as a part of my life. As u read it’s like that the 2^nd part is smoother and I had no problem at all but it is impossible. Of coz there were obstacles, issues and tests for me. It was just for this time I faced it more rationally and didn’t forget to ask for His guidance (Insya ALLAH).

Overall, 2008 or SMKT had turn me into a survivor, miss independent (the title I love the most!), tougher, braver, more self confident, optimistic (really? Not sure abt dis 1), a diva (hahaha), have improved my English (don’t u notice it? thanx to Mr. K) and after all a teacher called Fatim Nadila. A brand new Fatim Nadila (really? But I still donno how to swim, love riddles so much, love hear new jokes, hate bijan n wilted veggie, still fat, bla3x and of coz the Fatim/Chik/chiko dat u knew b4 is still alive…)

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